I’ve been struggling with something the past couple of weeks.
Last summer, my life was FULL of activity and outings and margaritas by the pool. I would go to church Sunday morning and pack three outfits to accommodate the array of things my friends and I could do (hiking? beach trip? shopping? picnic? pool time?). I was surrounded by community. I rarely slept more than 6 hours a night. I grounded myself one day a week in order to do laundry, pet my cats, and catch up on sleep. It was lovely. My life was full and I was happy.
Things have changed a bit. (Understatement?) My priorities are 1. My Husband and 2. My baby, then all the rest of everyone else. The bottom line is that my life is still full and I am so very happy in so many way, but things are different. A summer with non-stop friends and socializing isn’t on the agenda, and it’s been making me anxious.
I am afraid that once Baby A gets here my friends will have already drifted so far away that no one shows up at the hospital to meet my little man. (Or, you know, the rest of his life.)
There is no going back to summers like last summer… things are going to look a little different for me; but I still need friends. (My extroversion is not going anywhere)
I hope my friends are patient with me. I hope that they’re understanding of my new role and new priorities (and new bed time). I hope that they don’t give up on me and stop trying. I hope that they believe me when I tell them that I want Baby A to grow up whilst in the midst of them. I hope they give me a little grace through all the change and trust that I am still the same snarky giggle-fest.. even with a baby bump.